A change to come?

It kind of hits you when you least expect it. You wake up one morning and something just isn’t right. It doesn’t matter whether you have children and a spouse, or if you’re single. Makes no odds if you’re young or old either.

Nothing on Earth matters when you get that feeling.

You don’t know what you are doing. You don’t know why you get dressed, walk or drive to work. You really cannot understand why you do what you do all day. And it’s starting to hurt, like deafening static in your head.

Then you get home. You make some dinner. Then you watch some television. Maybe you go to the gym or indulge in some other physical activity that you have been told is good for you.
And then you lie down in your bed.

Maybe a clock ticks. Maybe you just lie there, in the dark, in silence. The day is done. At the weekend you plan to indulge in a hobby, or maybe in some stimulant and/or depressive substances.

By the time Sunday comes around you’re on the run. Sunday night? Well, Sunday night brings mild to moderate depression.

And then your week starts again.

Welcome to life.

You had a glimpse of another life during your childhood. Maybe it was a movie that you saw, with a lifestyle on screen that was attractive. Your teachers told you otherwise. Maybe your parents did. They only wanted the best for you. The best job. The best chance in life.
But now you think about your life and you want to cry.

It’s desperation. All you are doing is chasing money. In fact, everything you do is about money. You wake up to make it and go to sleep worrying about it. And you spend it so that you can forget about it.

Surely there is more out there?

Time Management Tips - 3 simple rules.

Time management is a key skill. Take a look at anyone who has made a success of themselves in almost any endeavour, and you will note that they have mastered the area of time skills; they are in control of their time.

However, time management is also a skill that many people find it difficult to master. If you are in any doubt about this, just think of all those people that are late for meetings, or hand in reports late. Just think about all of those people who are stressed that you know, the ones who are running around at work complaining about there never being ‘enough hours in the day’.

Well, it’s true. There aren’t enough hours in the day. In fact, we spend pretty much half the day sleeping. And then we are effectively directed by modern society to fill the rest of the day with a fantastic amount of tasks and duties. And alongside all of these tasks, we also have to fit in some time for our loved ones, as well as relaxation.

So how do we manage our work time effectively? How could we build our time skills? Well, we could buy one of those fancy PDAs, or we could buy a nice looking desk diary.
Or we could just get real.

You see, time management comes down to a very simple thing: prioritising. All the best time management aids out there can’t help you with this. The principle is very simple and it takes no time at all to master.

All you have to do to practise effective time management in your job is to remember that you should only ever focus on three big things in one day. That’s three things, no more. So all of the big tasks that you are given to do, or all of the big projects that you take on, make sure you only focus on three of them per day.

Why just three? Well, anything more would just complicate your day. And when you think about it, three big things to focus on in one day is quite a lot.

However, the trick with time skills like this one is to keep the focus. If you allow your brain to be distracted by anything other than those three things (barring emergencies, obviously), you will achieve nothing.

Follow this time management principle and you will find that your day becomes incredibly focused. You will not be distracted; will achieve things every day without question. And perhaps most importantly you will not be stressed due to the mistaken belief that you have to do everything that lands on your desk.

I'm back

Okay, it's been a while.

I've been away, but I am back. See you soon...

Why Having Values Is Important

Values matter because we will not be on this planet for an infinite number of years. Human beings live and die, just like any other animal on the planet, and if we do not have a consistent set of values to guide our life, then we will just drift.

Every day time slips away, and once a day is done, it is gone forever. So having values shapes our lives, otherwise we are just waiting to die. But how do we know what values are best for us?
Well, some of us like to be in good physical condition. That is a common value set for many people. Others like to make a certain income. And some people like to help the people around them be the best that they can be.

It is having this richness of experience that values bring, this ‘tailor made’ aspect to our life, which makes the whole value defining process so vital to our self development. Of course, you could live without values, but it is arguable that anyone who does is essentially living a shapeless, aimless life.

If time is limited, and days, once experienced, are lost, then how we use that time is also under threat if values are not clear. If we do not know ‘how we live our life’, the practises we follow and the principles we hold, then all we can ever be is distracted. Our lives will become disorganised and cluttered. We will put on weight, be subject to illness, and so on.

All this is great news for those who are trying to live a life that is more aware, but what happens when we look carefully at our lives and realise that we have many values, many areas in which we need to develop?

It is common for people to feel overwhelmed. They have to understand and follow value sets attached to their health, their finances, their relationships, the list can be huge. And because they know that a life without values is meaningless, they begin to panic, become disillusioned, and feel that the job of fostering values is ‘impossible’. There is so much to take care of, it seems daunting.

Remember that values are about interacting with life. While you may want to be financially abundant, your value in this area may require you to be patient, while the resources the world offers you come into alignment. Similarly, valuing peak physical fitness requires work and commitment.

Having values is important because otherwise you are literally unguided, and could spend your life achieving nothing, experiencing nothing unique, and, ultimately, just waiting to die.

Sticking to your goals

In my Taekwondo class there is a big sign at the front of the room that says ‘This is a Black Belt Class’. The first time I entered the room for my introductory class, that sign scared the hell out of me. There I was, in my crisp white uniform, trying to look good, and all I could see were those words up there, intimidating me.

It was not until a few months later that I realised they were there to dare me, to inspire me.

Martial arts is all about goal-setting, and the single-mindedness it takes to reach a goal.
Once I started setting targets for myself in Taekwondo, the way to meet those targets became immediately clear. Just keep going. The discipline requires you to practise regularly, to not waver, and to keep going until you have reached your goal.

And I can say now, with pride, that I am a black belt in Taekwondo. Furthermore, I can also say that I have fallen over a thousand times, I have hurt parts of my body I didn’t even know existed, and I can’t even count the number of times I have wanted to miss a class due to fatigue or lack of motivation.

But I am still a black belt. And that is entirely down to persistence and commitment. No human body is naturally predisposed to Taekwondo, and it requires training. When I started I was definitely not predisposed to it. However, my teacher kept pushing me, kept reminding me of my goals, and would not let me be negative. I would become a black belt, I would.

In fact anyone can become a black belt in a martial art; the only differing factor is time. If you are committed to it, then you will reach that goal, in other words.

This has a lot to do with other goals in your life. I have recently started introducing some light exercise into my early morning routine. Fifty sit ups. The way I did this was I signed up to something called Life Tango, and used their goal setting software to set myself a goal of doing fifty sit ups, every day, within a month.

I started at thirty, worked up to thirty five, and then forty. And at one point I checked in on Life Tango and realised that I had been regularly exercising every day for two weeks. Just like that.

It was on that day that I did my first set of fifty. Now, I can happily report that I have recorded on Life Tango the completion of that goal.

So what’s my point? Well, as it was with Taekwondo and the sit ups, virtually any goal you want to set can be reached. When I saw that I had completed on the sit ups, I was quite taken aback. This is because prior to the goal setting that led to the goal completion, I had made excuses. All I had done when it came to that kind of exercise is make excuses about time, about energy, and about skill. I hadn’t got down and just done some sit ups!

Goal setting and goal achievement are all about saying you will do something, working out a simple plan, and then sticking to it. If the plan has to change a little, change it. It is still a plan for a goal that you have expressed a desire to meet.

And the confidence that I have achieved after doing those fifty sit ups, and making that black belt, propels me to new goals, new achievements. I now need new challenges.

And every time I set a challenge, that little voice that says it can’t be done is a little quieter. This is because I have the knowledge that comes with knowing that if I set a goal I can reach it.
In fact, when you think about it, any goal can be reached, as long as you put the work in. My taekwondo teacher made this abundantly clear, when he was asked, one lesson, to answer the question ‘what is a black belt’.

All he said was, ‘a black belt is the person in the room who has fallen flat on their face the most times.’

If you ever wanted a definition of goal commitment, that’s it right there.

How To Get A Flat Stomach

It is a dream, at least for most of us, to get a flat stomach, with abdominal muscles that are attractive. However, this dream can turn into a reality if we practise some commitment and some self-discipline. The basic areas in which a flat stomach can be facilitated are those of diet and exercise. Once we have these two areas mastered, the desired effect will arrive soon enough.

Exercise
Firstly, whatever you do, pay no attention to those fitness gurus who say you must do sit-ups and crunches to gain a flat stomach. This is not good advice. These exercises in particular take up a large amount of your time, and will do nothing for your stomach. They are actually very low in intensity, and therefore do not bring the kind of drastic results that we are looking for.

And while we are on the subject of exercise, maintain a regime where cardiovascular activity is prominent, but not too prominent. This means not doing cardiovascular every day of the week, but instead at regular intervals. Space out your cardiovascular training and you will feel the benefits a lot quicker than if you just do cardiovascular every day for long periods of time.
Don’t invest in huge and expensive workout machines. Instead, buy some free weights, not necessarily huge ones, just weights that you can carry in your hand to add that little bit extra intensity to what you are doing.

Lastly, as regards exercise, focus on full body workouts rather than targeted parts of your body. The overall level of fitness this brings to your body is much more effective than the effects of targeted work.

Nutrition
Avoid carbohydrate foods that are not complex. This means avoiding the white bread for a start. Always go for grain bread if bread is a part of your diet. And when it comes to rice and pasta, contrary to popular belief, they are not good if they’re white. Go for whole-wheat every time. The white stuff just goes straight to your stomach.

When you feel the need for a soft drink, abstain. Sugary drinks are one of the main contributors to all that fat around your tummy. Instead, go for water every time for refreshment.
Lastly, whatever you do, stop eating the fried food. Anything that falls into that camp just becomes a big layer of fat around your stomach. Make a pact with yourself to eat healthily. Anything fried is just going to do major damage to your looks.

A few tips, then, on how to gain a flat stomach. Good exercise for the whole body, at regular intervals, and sensible eating, should soon see you on the way towards those magical abs.

Black Card Circle

Hi everyone,

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